Monday, November 21, 2005

Stopped

"Ideally, this should be the time when a concerted effort is made to engage in reflection and review. A form of loosening is taking place, a solution to a stuck situation which disengages one from what was in order to prepare one for what will be".

Excerpt from chapter on Mercury Retrograde
Retrograde Planets - Traversing the Inner Landscape by Erin Sullivan

I was going to do so much today. But it's lunchtime, and the only thing I've accomplished is taking the cat to the vet for some antibiotics. He is asleep alongside me (the cat not the vet!), occasionally half-waking himself when he emits a dainty sneeze, then sinking back into slumber. I have told a couple of agencies I am free for work, and had a call back from a third asking if I would like to be put forward for a maternity cover contract - I said yes. Wait and see.

Other than that, I have read a few favourite blogs and had an early lunch. It's very cold outside and I want to ignore my to-do list, hunker down and read. I should be chasing work, cleaning, knitting, planning, going shopping, or starting the mammoth task of clearing my junk in anticipation of moving in a year or so. I have been a permanent salaried worker for so many years that now that I am not I find it a struggle always to manage time in a productive way, or at least in a way that meets my own standards.

Am I allowed days like this during the working week? Is it sloth, or is it letting go?

15 Comments:

Blogger sonia a. mascaro said...

I like this quote!
I hope your little cat will be healthy, soon.

I wish to you nice and happy events!

Only today I see the Egypt photo. Thanks so much! Wonderful. I made a comment on "Pictures".
I am looking forward to see more photos!

2:13 pm  
Blogger I Feel Good said...

View it as letting go, Mary:)

Oh and I'd love to see a pic of your cat someday:)

2:44 pm  
Blogger Jean said...

Oh, I hope you managed to snuggle up with the cat and enjoy it while you can! (but no, I wouldn't find it easy either. Didn't do much this past weekend but stay in out of the cold and try to stop cough turning into a chest infection, and did I manage to enjoy cosseting myself? not really)

3:39 pm  
Blogger leslee said...

When my corporate freelance work slowed to nearly nothing in late 2001, I went crazy trying to figure out what to do with my time. Now with several years of intermittent work slowdowns I've got that time-wasting thing down to a science! Seriously, I do have to make lists for myself - both work projects and personal projects - so that I don't waste away all of time doing things like surfing the 'net. But you are allowed slacktime, too! :-)

4:21 pm  
Blogger MB said...

I have no difficulty wasting time and, like Leslee, do better making lists. But I also think it's entirely reasonable to "decide" to waste time. You have a choice that's entirely up to you -- what an opportunity -- what a luxury! And you are the only one who gets to deem anything "appropriate" or not.

9:03 pm  
Blogger Mary said...

Thank you everyone. Nice people!!

Leslee/Moose: Always good to have feedback on this sort of things from those who have experienced it. Yes, I need a to do list - just not an overly rigorous one!

Jean: I hope you are continuing to take good care of yourself [[[Jean]]]

9:51 am  
Blogger MB said...

Was there another post here to do with music? I was coming back to read again and comment. Am I imagining things? Perplexed!

9:06 pm  
Blogger Mary said...

Hi Moose: Yes there was but I took it down, I thought on reflection that it was really badly written. You're not hallucinating!!

9:53 pm  
Blogger Mary said...

Moose: I'll rework it and post it again in few days time ....

10:17 pm  
Blogger MB said...

Methinks you set yourself some high standards. ;-)

11:49 pm  
Blogger Jean said...

what? no, it wasn't! and gosh I mercilessly notice if something is badly written, however highly I rate the writer...

12:18 pm  
Blogger Mary said...

Moose/Jean: my own mercilessly high standards (plus my justified fear of other people's!) was one of the reasons I took it down. I also want to develop the theme a bit ...

Jean: I hope you are beginning to feel better?

1:27 pm  
Blogger Jean said...

I'm much better thanks, just coughing a bit and sleeping an inordinate amount. And, oh my goodness, the wind is wuthering in the alley-way behind my building and hail or something clattering against my office window...brrr. Stay warm.

3:30 pm  
Blogger Mary said...

The heavens have opened in South London as well - high wind, driving rain, leaves swirling. Glad you're feeling better.

3:35 pm  
Blogger Unknown said...

Hi Mary - found you through 3rd house journal and liked that quote a lot, resonates for me at the moment. Congrats on your joining the realms of the self-employed - it took me a while to get into the groove, esp as someone who always feels the need to be 'doing something productive' - not easy when your working day can stretch from when you get up to when you go to bed! I'd agree with Leslee that giving myself permission can help a lot - either deciding to 'take it easy for the afternoon' or doing somethign else, rather than feeling half-guilty all afternoon and not enjoying it anyway! I couldn't go back to not having the freedom and responsibility of working for myself ever again - hope you find it equally wonderful.

12:11 pm  

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